24.11.14

Failed fantasies

As the end of the calendar year approaches, and as the end of my age year approaches, I've been thinking about my fantasies and how sadly failed they are... maybe I can come up with better ones?

I have this fantasy friend. We get together every few weeks, drinking wine or tea, nibbling on something delicious, sitting in amazingly comfy chairs and we talk. About life, love - all those Big Things like our hopes, our fears. I'm pretty sure those friends exist, because I've seen them on tv and in the movies. But I don't have one of those friends.

I have this fantasy job, where I'm paid what I'm worth to do work that makes me feel great and sends me home at night feeling energized, not ennervated. My superiors appreciate what I'm doing and support my efforts, my colleagues are collaborative and eager to hear about new books and ideas. My job isn't bad, but it's not one of those jobs.

I have this fantasy body, one that's a few inches taller than my current height (current for the past 38 years! I was promised at least 3 more inches, and not the 3 inches the ads say will make my wife happier!) and slender and flexible and not starting to get old. Guess what? I don't have that body.

It's not that I hate my friends, my job or my body. It's that I have these fantasies... unfulfilled fantasies. Maybe I need to stop fantasizing?

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