Not even for Narnia

Colby Cosh (who is seemingly starring in today's posts) pointed me to this post about upcoming video games:
"The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (Gameboy Advance)

"I'm not buying a Gameboy until they bring out Mere Christianity." I wish I could've somehow worked that into a conversation, but I couldn't. This is a point-and-click style adventure game tied to the upcoming movie (trailer here), but since there's no mouse on the Gameboy this means "walk slowly across the screen and click".

I played a little girl in a dress (Lucy, presumably) wandering in a mysterious snowy landscape, with an "A" button for jump and a "B" button for kick. I was approached by a faun, one Mr. Tumnus, who rapidly broke down and blurted out his story about a White Witch whose spell had been cast upon the once green and pleasant land. I tried to kick him repeatedly in the groin: B B B B B B. The game tediously refused to acknowledge this attempt. He asked me to shove some boulders out of a path, even though I was a tiny weak girl and he was at least eight pixels taller than me; after another frustrating round of B B B B I gave in and cleared the path, which allowed us to walk into his home, where I went around unsuccessfully trying to break stuff (B B B B B).

I think this game would be sort of like a heavily-abridged book on tape where the author made you solve an arithmetic problem before hearing each passage. On the other hand, it was fun to imagine going back in time to tell my young self reading the book that one day it would be reconstituted on a lightweight, portable electronic device with an animated color screen where I could knee Mr. Tumnus in the 'nads."
I'm really excited about the movie, and I've always thought that the Ransome trilogy would make a good book or tv series, but this is just a bit much. Does anyone else agree? And why are the executors of the estate allowing this?!


Sherri said...

Money? Copious amounts of money?

Lazygal said...

Sherri, I'd agree except that Doug Gresham (stepson of Jack) has been pretty zealous about not selling the Lewis legacy out to the Lowest Common Denominator. To me, this is so clearly the LCD and anti-Jack's message that, well, my mind boggles as to "why".

Aravis said...

Promotional? This plus the movies bring the books back to the forefront of children's (and their parents') minds perhaps? Although it sounds boring enough to turn kids off, still Gresham couldn't know that before it was made.

chorus girl said...

I'm commenting on this a little late, but I had to challenge lazygal's defense of Doug as protector of the Lewis estate. He agreed to those proposed Narnia sequels by authors other than Lewis, a project about which I've admittedly heard little since the initial furore, but which still disappoints/shocks me to think about. A Narnia video game seems quite innocent in comparison.

Lazygal said...

Cam, you're right about the "new" Narnia books and Doug's role in that. I guess I meant that he *claims* to be looking out for Jack's legacy more than he really is...

One person I know that knew Jack and Doug says that Jack would be pretty horrified at Doug's caretaking of the legacy. I wonder if that's true!